Why do I feel like sheep at the slaughterhouse?

Today's the day. 

1530hrs. 

Leaving in about an hour and a half. 

Gonna know if I still have a job or if I'm being made redundant after a year-long maternity leave. 

Somehow I know it's the latter. They couldn't find me another role when my dept. closed down and now it's going to be be-bye. They might call me later on for casual work or, if I'm lucky, a longish contract, but I'll have lost my permanent status and my years of service there.

And in the meantime, how does a mom of a ten month old, who only wants part-time work to start with, goes about finding another job in the industry? 

I need this like a bullet in the head.

And my mom could be going under the knife any day now. 

Sounds like a soap? Feels like a soap. Can I turn the telly off?